I Think She'll Be Scoring....A Lot

Yesterday was the start of soccer.

I know it's kind of late in the season but that's how we roll her on the base.  They press us to have our registration papers and money in by a certain date but then take their time actually starting.

Lael missed the first practice because they needed a family to switch teams to accommodate another family and me being the awesome kind-hearted person I am, volunteered.

Lael will be 7 at the end of October.  I was curious as to whether they would put her on the 7-9 year old team or the 5-6 year old team.  

Well they decided to put her with the 5 yr olds.  While some parents may have fought the decision.  I giggled a little.  She's the biggest one out there but she fits right in.

I was amazed at how well she was doing since she hasn't played soccer since she was 4.

They started off practicing their skillz and then it was time for a scrimmage game.

They also took TONS of water breaks.  You can see she took her blue Gatorade serious.

If you look you will notice Lael isn't in this photo.  That's because she was scoring a goal.  She did that about 3 more times.  Yeah. She kinda rocked.

Funny because I had to convince her to play this year.  I'm glad I pushed her. She had a blast.

(You notice she's wearing the same clothes as the pictures from 2 years ago....yeah...she's tiny)

Matters Of Kobi's Heart

Kobi had his 4 month well baby appointment yesterday. I know I already expressed my shock about the fact that he indeed is 4 months already.

He is doing remarkably well.

If you follow me on Twitter you may have seen that my little bear has been scheduled on and off with a Pediatric Cardiologist. I had not blogged about what was going on. Not because I didn’t want to share but because I had been too tired to blog.

So let me give you a little background.

Right after he was born they let me see him and then they gave him to my hubby and they went and cleaned him off.

Once they rolled me into the post-op room I could hear them whispering and poking at him. Apparently they were concerned with his breathing. Not the lack there of but the rapid pace of it.

They couldn’t figure out why he was breathing so fast. They checked his oxygen levels and gave me instructions to watch his nostrils for flaring and to make sure his lips don’t turn blue.

Yeah. Scary.

They didn’t think it was anything to worry about but of course I didn’t sleep at all because I was on nostril watching duty.

He never showed any signs of struggling to breath he just seemed to breath fast…and loud.

Very loud.

Almost like he was congested. Funny because Lael had the same problem and she was diagnosed with Tracheomalacia (underdeveloped cartilage in her tracheas) when she was a baby.

I didn’t say anything because they were convinced it would go away.

But it didn’t.

When I took him in for his 2 and 6 week checkups they started to get concerned.

I took him in for his 2 month checkup and they decided that his breathing hadn’t gotten any better and they wanted him to see a Cardiologist. That day.

They did an Echo and EKG on his heart and the results showed that he has an extra vessel that leads to somewhere. They aren’t sure where. Also, his left ventricle is on a scale of 1 to 10 ten 1 being the smallest and 10 being the largest, he’s a 10. That means if it got any bigger it would larger than normal. Does that make sense? So it’s big but not quite bigger than normal…yet.

Of course this drove me into a fit of what if’s. But I remained calm.

From then we went back and forth between his Pediatrician and the Cardiologist. We also had an appointment with the ENT doctor who diagnosed my baby with Laryngomalacia (in which the soft, immature cartilage of the upper larynx collapses inward).

Almost the same thing Lael had. However, it didn’t explain why he was breathing fast, just why he was breathing loud.

Blah, Blah, fast forward to a few more appointments.

The conclusion: He still breaths loud (he’ll grow out of it just like Lael did). They still don’t know why he breaths fast or if it’s related to his heart at all. They aren’t sure where the extra vessel is going but they would have to do a CAT Scan and they don’t want to put him through that. I agree.

So now we just wait.

He is super healthy otherwise and that is the main reason they are not concerned. He is growing and is right on target developmentally.

He is 15.4 lbs and 25 inches. He’s not quite as big as the 4 month old girl we saw yesterday that was 21 pounds but he is just fine.

Because I'm Not Already Stressed

Lael will be 7 next month. I'm not even sure how that's possible. I mean seriously, she was JUST born. Ok, maybe not just born, but 7?

She is now in the 2nd grade and with that comes the beginning of her social life. Before it was a few arranged playdates here and there but other than that she just played with her sister.

That has all now begun to change.

Since the end of the last school year she has been talking about a friend of hers that lives here on the base. She wanted a sleepover, a playdate, something.

I blew her off most (meaning ALL) of the summer because I didn't know the girl or her parents. Having a new baby to tend to made it easy for me to put off.

After a few weeks Lael stopped mentioning her and I figured I was in the clear.

Then they saw each other at the pool. And again at the park. And again at the library.

And then school started and they now ride the bus next to each other everyday. So naturally the begging for playdates and sleepover resumed. But also Lael started asking to call her.

I thought I would get away with the whole "I don't know her mommy or her phone number" bit, but no. She whipped out her notebook and there the girls was. Written in the neatest 6yr old writing. I sighed and said we would call her the next week. And I repeated that for a few weeks.

Now you may be asking yourself, what's the problem? Why don't you just let her call the girl.

Well what I didn't tell you is that this little girl isn't just any little girl. She's the daughter of the base commander. The commander of the ENTIRE base that I live on. That's like the president of a company you work for.

Well yesterday she bugged the hell out of me about calling this girl. And you know what? I gave in. I dialed the number (praying her father wouldn't answer) and her mother answered. The mother remembered me and was really sweet and apparently the little girl had been bugging her as well.

I told her that her daughter could call anytime before 8:30 and she said the same went for Lael. I handed her the phone and she giggled so hard that she began to cry. You see, she's never been allowed to talk to friends on the phone before. So this is a new chapter in itself. Of course I had to force her off the phone 30 minutes later but she smiled the rest if the night.

They have a date to call each other again tonight. My little girl is growing up. I am growing with her, because it took her pushing to make me realize it's about the kids not us parents.

I just hope they don't start fighting because confronting the commanders wife about her daughter, well that could become a bit awkward.

4 Months

Dear Kobi,

How has it already been 4 months? How is it that I love you more than I ever thought possible?

I was afraid before. Afraid of becoming a new mom again. Afraid that I wouldn’t have enough love for you and your sister. Afraid of having a boy.

It was silly of me to be afraid. Once they put you in my arms all the fear disappeared.

You have brought a new meaning to our family. You have taught me that it is possible for your heart to grow bigger. You have taught your father what it’s really like to raise a baby. You have taught your sister’s the ULTIMATE responsibility.

You were born on May 14th at 9:54am.

Right off you opened your eyes and took me in. Took the world in. Everyone commented how “alert” you were. I knew you would be. I had a feeling.

You are so like your sister in so many ways but also very different.

You are barely 4 months and there is so much you can do. So many ways your personality is starting to show.

You can laugh.

You can smile.

You can hold your head up.

You can grab at and hold your toys.

You can chew on anything you can hold.

You have recently discovered your fingers and sometimes get carried away and choke on them.

You love to stand up on my legs. You are very strong.

You can turn your head from side to side.

You have recently learned that you can squeal so that’s lots of fun.

You love taking a bath but only in really warm water.

You have learned how to pull yourself across the floor by using this worm like motion. That’s super cute.

You also know how to scoot yourself out of your car seat if I don’t have you buckled in. Sorry about not knowing that. Hope you didn’t bump your head to hard.

You arch your back when you see me because you know that I’m going to pick you up.

You love to fall asleep in the crook of my neck. I kind of dig it too.

You like to be scared. When I hide and jump out you go into a fit of giggles.

Everyone says you are big for your age. You are wearing 6-9 month clothes and almost 15lbs. I love every single roll you have.

You are still breastfeeding. It’s out quiet time with each other. You recently started looking up and me when you nurse and occasionally stop just to smile at me and then continue. It melts my heart every time.

I recently started breaking you into your crib. I also recently gave up.

I’ll try again later. Life is too short not to enjoy the time I have to cuddle with you.

Soon you’ll be too big and won’t want to sleep with mom.

But for now I’ll enjoy your company.

These past 4 months have gone by in a flash. I am excited to see what the next 4 will bring.

But not too fast ok? Take your time. There is no rush.

May We Never Forget

I, like many others am re-posting today. My original post was written in 2008. My heart still hurts from this tragedy and always will....

Every year this day creeps up on me. I know it's September. I am conscious of it but then it's here.

I still remember where I was when it happened.

I still remember the panic that took place in our nation's capital.

I still remember seeing the smoke from the Pentagon from MILES away.

I still remember.....

Here is my post from last year on this very day.

*********************************************
9/11 Pentagon Memorial

Where do I even begin...one thing I can say is that my eyes are still burning from all the tears.

I was blessed today to be able to attend the Pentagon 9/11 Memorial Dedication Ceremony.

I have been stationed out of the Pentagon for 3 years and was privileged to receive a ticket to witness first hand the unveiling of the Pentagon 9/11 Memorial.

My day started at 5a.m. I got dressed in my BDU's and hopped a ride to the Metro. The mood was a solemn one.

It was still dark as I caught rode the Metro to the Pentagon Entrance. Once arriving there I was awestruck by the amount of people, both military and civilian that were already lining up at 6 a.m. to witness this once in a lifetime event.

I couldn't believe I was going to be taking part in history.

My tribute to the victims really started Saturday when me and my girlfriend participated in the 4th Annual Freedom Walk that started at the Women's Memorial at Arlington Cemetery and ended after a 1-Mile walk to the Pentagon South Parking.

Every year at this time I get sad just thinking that you never know when you or your loved ones lives will be snatched.

Being military makes me that much more tearful because I know that I am doing good for my country and keeping my daughter safe.

Enjoy the pictures....and NEVER FORGET!

What I Say SHOULD Go

Being a parent can be hard. We all know this. Being a step-parent can be really hard.

There are always times when a child will try to play one parent against the other and more times when they try to play the grandparents against the parents.

But what am I supposed to do when the step-child plays the step-mom against the mother-in-law.

Pull my hair out is what I want to do.

Let me explain.

D is the first grandbaby. Naturally she will be the shining star. The fact that she isn’t here on a regular basis makes the spoiling that much worse.

She gets away with more than I see necessary from all parties involved.

But as she approaches 9 and Lael is learning habits from here I am becoming fed up with some of the behavior.

Quite often me and the kids will drive to the MIL’s house and stay the night. We’ll watch movies and order pizza and just enjoy each other’s company.

But mostly every time we are together at my MIL’s, D feels that she can do what she wants.

What doesn’t help is that my MIL doesn’t seem to notice that we are being played.

Case and Point:

I tell the girls to put on their pajamas and then they can play/watch a movie, etc.

I go upstairs and see Lael doing what I said but where is D? In her grandmothers room showing her how to brush her dolls hair.

I go in and tell her to do what I said. And do you know what happens next? Do ya?

My MIL tells me that she’s showing her something, turns around and tells her to finish what she was showing her.

What the fuck.

Another Case and Point:

My MIL bought white tank tops for the girls so they would have matching shirts for pictures. She bought 1 pack and since Lael needed new ones for the Fall I said that I would keep them so that I don’t have to buy any.

D’s mom never puts them on her so there would be no need for her to keep any. I made this point and D tried to argue with me that she does wear them. I shut her down and explained that in the almost 9 years that she’s been on earth her mother has NEVER send undershirts/tanks to go under her shirts.

I thought that was the end of it and told the kids to pack their bags and for Lael to put the shirts in her suitcase. Well a few minutes later they come down and my MIL says she gave D 2 and Lael 2.

I thought I had made myself clear. But apparently when they went upstairs D whined to my MIL about it and she gave her what she wanted.

It wasn’t about the shirts it was about not wanting Lael to have something that she didn’t have. I was pissed. So I went upstairs and put ALL of them in D's bag. I told Lael I would just buy her new ones.

Am I being sensitive because I thought it was kind of disrespectful. The last time I checked, I was the parent.

And being the parent, she should have done what I said first and then what she wanted to second.

Scenarios like this happened quite a few times between Sunday and Monday.

The thing is, I don’t have this problem with Lael. She knows better. It doesn’t matter what grandma or anyone else says. She’s gonna do what mom said first.

Is it D playing me? Is my MIL playing me?

I explained to hubby that is seems like whenever we are around her she forgets that I am the parent but more so with D not Lael. She hardly steps in when I’m correcting her.

I feel like because I am the step-mother I am not taken seriously and that she feels she has more of a say so than I do. Am I crazy?

What should I do?

Because I Forgot .....

.....to post this picture back in July.