Not Me! Monday

I did not threaten to stab Lael with my fork if she didn't stop playing at the dinner table. Only a psycho mom would say that.


I did not give the "stank" eye to this couple who came to see Madagascar 2 (without any kids) and proceed to talk the whole time. I did not want to tell them to shut the hell up.


I did not spend most of my work week reading blogs instead of doing work. That would be a waste of the taxpayers dollars.


I am not dragging out reading Breaking Dawn so I can finish it just in time to see Twilight the movie next weekend. That would be to "high schoolish" of me. :o)

I did not bribe my husband with some luvin' so that he would help me watch my friends 4 kids. I am much more mature than that.

I did not almost get sick watching Grey's Anatomy when they were untwisting the human pretzel guy. Seriously. Gross.

Ok, now your turn! Happy Monday! :o)

Tantrum Picture Story

This weekend was rough with Lael. While she often makes me laugh as you've seen in the last post, she can also make me want to lock myself in my room and put earplugs in my ears.


While that seems a bit dramatic, let me show you what I dealt with at 11pm last night when she refused to go to bed until she could watch iCarly Goes to Japan for the 5th time.

Photo 1: The pouting is beginning. You can see the circles under her eyes but she is a fighter.

Photo 2: I really pissed her off when I started taking photos of her meltdown.






Photo 3: Here is when the "Ugly Cry" began. She can pull this one out like a pro.






Photo 4: The waterworks begin and she is trying to smack the camera away from me.







Photo 5: She finally starts to calm down and wants to lay down in my lap.





Photo 6: She finally fell asleep. Yes, she sleeps with her eyes cracked sometimes.

It was a struggle this weekend and I am convinced that she is not ready to give up naps yet, even on the weekends.

I thought once they hit 5 the tantrums were supposed to stop but does it look like it stopped to you? No. Not so much. Oh well I'm still lovin' my baby....tantrums and all.

Always Good for a Giggle

Lael's quite funny. She is always making me laugh. Here are a few things she's said.

Last night my husband went to pick up D. She must have brought her school pictures with her and left them on the kitchen counter.

This morning me and La are up eating breakfast before Gymnastics and I picked up the pictures and showed them to her.

She looks at them and this conversation occurred:

Her: "Mommy...D is the President of the United States!?!?"

Me: "No, what are you talking about?"

Her: "Well she has the United States behind her."

Me: (Giggling) "Lael that's the United States Flag, she got to pick that background like when you picked your purple background for school pictures."

Her: "Oh...hee hee. I thought it was supposed to be Orock Obama."

Me: "Yes honey...it will be soon."

And then tonight we were at my girlfriends for dinner. She had made fajitas and some other yummy goodness including cranberry sauce.



I didn't think La had ever had it before and the strange look she gave it on her plate confirmed just that.



I looked at her slice it up with her fork and then take a nibble. I explained to her that it was cranberry sauce.



She looked up with me with wide eyes and said:



"I can EAT cranberry juice...cool?!?"



Yes honey, cool. Isn't that just cool how they do that.

Holiday Blues

Every year for the past 5 years I have been putting myself under stress.

I have not figured out exactly when to start Christmas shopping and it seems like I can't seem to get it right.

I think I have more than enough time but look there are only like 40 days left!

In addition to that, I have a dysfunctional family. I'm sure everybody things their family is wacky but I promise my family takes the cake.

Because of the funkiness, I usually have to split myself up between my mom's house and my in-laws house.

Some years I have wanted to break down and cry. It seems like I can't get them under one roof for any holiday except for Lael's birthday and even then things are tense.

My dear mother-in-law has always tried to make things easier on me and has decided that she will have Thanksgiving at her house and has even invited a few of my military families over who aren't near their extended family. She decided that she would not do Christmas so that I could spend it with my parents instead of driving up and down the road.

This seems like a good idea but I am stressed wondering how my mother would react to a Thanksgiving without me even if that means having me for Christmas.

I feel like a kid going through some wacky custody battle. There is so much to deal with during the holidays and I am a HUGE fan of Christmas. It is my favorite besides my daughter's birthday of course.

Why can't things be like it is in the movies? Why can't we be just one big happy family? Why is it that I seem to be the only one that is forgiving and can move on? Is it that impossible to get along with each other for a few hours once a year?

Apparently so. What to do, what to do? I guess as the time gets closer I will decide what I'm going to do.

What's scary is I'm always afraid that my decision will hurt someones feeling. But what about mine?

America's Next Top Toddler (or preschooler)

Today was cold and rainy and all I ever want to do on cold an rainy days is curl up on the couch and watch TV with a bag of chips and salsa.

But for me...not.so.much. Of course I had to go to work. Thank goodness for Veteran's Day this work week has been short so I was extra excited that it's almost Friday!!!

I hitched a ride home with a co-worker so that I didn't have to encounter my daily public transportation dance. I would get home 15 minutes early because of this ride and as a bonus wouldn't have some strange, stinky guy pressing himself against me on the crowded Metro Train...eewww.

Anyway, I get home and the door is locked so I rang and could hear the piddle paddle of Lael's little feet running down the stairs to come unlock the door for me. I was so ready to wrap my arms around my 30 something pounds of sweetness but guess what I saw when she opened the door??

What is that on her lips you may ask?? What that? Oh that, yeah that's lipstick. The only tube I own and have had since she was 1 when I bought it to put on her cheeks for her 1st...well 2nd Halloween since she was 2 days old on her 1st one.

Yeah but I pulled it out this past Halloween to give her rosy cheeks as a Cheerleader and the laziness that consumes me led me to leave it in a CLEAR bag sitting on my kitchen counter.

Her it is on her shirt. I'm not even going to think about whether the SHOUT will get this stain out.

And of course she would have it smeared down her leg as well. If she's going to stain her clothes it may as well be the whole damn outfit right?

Here is the evidence on the counter where the CLEAR bag used to live. So what did I do you may ask? I grabbed my camera and took pictures of course! Just when I wonder what I'm going to blog about opportunity presents itself.

I can't be mad at the little squirt, what else would a normal 5 year old girl who is just learning about "fashion" do with a tube of lipstick sitting all whilly nilly on the kitchen counter??

I guess she won't be like me, the mom who never has and never will wear makeup...or is this a one time thing. Ask me in about 10 years. I do have 10 years to think about makeup right???

Life and Death

I need a bit of advice. Lael is at a stage where she is beginning to question life and death. She's becoming more and more curious on why and how babies come. She knows they are carried in a mother's belly but is curious for how the baby gets there and why I don't have another baby.

At the same time she is asking lots of questions about death. She and her sister have played the "Play Dead" game and I have freaked out and told them it wasn't allowed. Just the idea of one of them pretending to be dead scares the hell out of me.

At this time in Lael's life, her Wonderful, Beautiful, Brilliant, Extraordinary (can you tell I love her) teacher is dealing with both life and death and has tried to explain it to Lael and the rest of her class.

This has prompted more questions from Lael. The thing is her teacher is away for a few weeks because she has a father who is dying from Cancer and only has a few days or maybe weeks left. She explained to the kids that she would be away for a few weeks because her father was sick and she was going to the hospital to be with him. She also told the kids that she is pregnant and will be having another baby in May. This is very exciting news for the kids as well.

My dilemma is that Lael comes home talking about her teacher's father and that he is sick and that he will get better soon and I'm afraid that I need to prepare her for the fact that her teacher may or may not tell them her father passed away.

If her teacher doesn't tell them is it ok for me to avoid explaining death to her? She understands about caterpillars dying and even her fish that we flushed down the toilet to be in the ocean with his "family". But I'm afraid that she won't understand human death the same way.

What should I do? How do I explain these things to my 5 year old? Should I do the dodge dance and wait a few years?

What did you do? Help.

Your Gonna Miss This...Moment #2

Update: Apparently I can't spell and I meant to write "leaf" instead of "leave"...man I'm getting old. Or dyslexic.


I know a time will come when something as simple as finding the perfect leaf will not make her happy.


She is in between stages now. Some days she's more complicated than others.


On this particular day she was ecstatic by walking outside and finding the perfect leaf.


Today she got pissed because at Target they were out of the specific type of pretzel she wanted.


The days are numbered for the simple things that will bring her joy.


I could have cared less about this specific leaf but she screamed in excitement and I knew I needed to get a picture because what if she could care less about leaves next Fall?


I will miss this and take joy in sharing her moments.






Visit Pam and read about other moments that will be missed.