In no particular order…..
-I will never get enough sleep. Ever.
-No matter how old they get, males will constantly forget to flush the toilet.
-In addition to flushing, they will also forget to put the seat down, I learned that the hard way.
-Apple Juice molds quickly in a thermos that been left at school for 5 days.
-The baby will trick me into believing he will only wake once at night and when I get used to that idea he will stab me in the back by waking up at 2, 4 and 5 this morning.
-Apparently I’m responsible for keeping up with all my things and knowing what Lael did with all her things as well. Also, I’m expected to be psychic.
-The only time I will have to myself is between 6 and 6:30am. I have learned that it is totally worth getting up early to savor these minutes.
-I haven’t done enough kegels (take that however you please).
-I have no friends (irl) to rescue me. I have 2 friends and they are in NJ and Germany. I am fucked.
-The baby is skilled enough to throw up and manage to get it IN my mouth.
-I am officially a soccer mom. You know the kind that threatens to beat her kid if she doesn’t kick the damn ball. She’ll score 3 goals which makes the sore throat totally worth it.
What things have you learned this week so far? I can’t be the only one.
Please tell me I’m not.