And Then They Wake Up And Repeat

If you were in my house at 11:30 pm last night this is what you would have witnessed.



Same thing happened the night before, and the night before that, and the night before that.

If I had to put my money on it, I just might see a repeat of it tonight.

I originally thought putting a DVR in their playroom was a good idea, but some shit is better left watching once and letting it go.

Thanks a lot HBO, thanks alot Disney Channel, and thankyouverymuch Hannah Montana.

Think they'll believe me if I tell them the concert expired and just delete it??

Probably not.

The Torn Heart Of A Child

I don't think it gets any easier as the years go by.

Being a parent is hard. Being a step-parent is worse.

I was lucky enough to be apart of D's life from the very beginning. I mean from the time she was a day old.

Hubby (boyfriend) at the time, insisted that I be there and go through this with him.

While at times I felt is was an impossible request (in addition to me being only 19!!) I soon feel into my role.

There have been MANY ups and downs over the last 8 years but they have made me stronger, my and hubbys relationship stronger, and in the end made me a better mother for Lael.

Through all the frustration, fights, tears, broken doors (don't ask), and many miles driven up an down the road, there wasn't a time when I remembered asking the child how she was doing.

She comes every other weekend. We get her every other major holiday. She has been with us the majority of the summer. All of June and mostly all of August.

I have loved it for the most part. But there are some issues that I'm sure every broken/blended family has.

Girlfriend has an attitude problem. Not a lash out screaming kind of attitude problem. No, I mean the quiet type. The one where she won't speak to anyone, rolls her eyes, secretly hit or shun Lael type of attitude.

I try to be understanding but there are times I lean on my friends to give me advice on how to deal with it.

I am a protective mother so when she's rude to Lael it gets right up under my skin. I fuss and punish but until last night, I never, ever, thought to sit her down and ask why.

I am ashamed to admit this. I sit Lael down often to talk about her feelings and how she should deal with situations.

I urge her to use her words and not lash out. The exact thing had have been doing all these years.

This brings me to my point.

Last night one of D's famous attitude episodes occurred and it made Lael upset.

I yelled out for her to ignore her because D was being mean and carried on.

But something tugged at my heart. Would I do the same if it were Lael? No. I would find out what was bugging her.

I called D into the room with me and asked her what was wrong. She gave me one her of famous shoulder shrugs and I felt my cheeks start to burn.

I decided I wasn't going to let that get in my way. I told her I wasn't taking her shrug as an answer. I grabbed her into my arms and explained to her that I'm her mommy too and mommies are supposed to make your problems go away and I can't make it go away if you won't tell me what it is.

She finally looked me in my eyes. My heart tugged. She grabbed my waist, pressed her head to my chest and let the tears go. She cried. I cried. There were so many things that have been left unsaid over the years.

I forget that she is almost 8. Not the kind of 8 we were when we were kids. But a new 8. You know the kind of 8 nowadays where kids are 10x's smarter than we were.

We talked for an hour. About how she feels about having 2 homes. About what her idea of a perfect home would be. About how she misses her sister when she's away.

Of course she dreams that she could have her mother and father together. What child wouldn't want that. But she also loves me and couldn't imagine life without me. She feels guilty because when she's home she wants to be with us and when she's with us she want to be home.

I can't begin to imagine what else goes through her head. I was though able to give her wise advise. You see I too came from a broken/blended family.

I explained the pros and cons. I explained that her recent rebellion at her mom's would not go unpunished at our house.

I explained that just like she has love from both families she will have consequences as well. I told her that we all loved her and that would never change.

I explained how luckier she was then some to have 2 mothers and she would always have double the love and attention.

She understood. She smiled and kissed me. She promised to talk to me whenever she was having a hard time with the situation.

I'll be here when she comes. With an open heart and an open mind.

I love you D, from the day you were born and I always will.

WAPOW!

Remember how I told yall I was going to do something productive while on leave? No? Ok, well I did.

I figured since Lael was going to be gone for the week I could re-decorate her playroom.

If you recall from previous posts, that room was a hot ass mess.

If you follow me on Twitter (if not you make me sad) you may have possibly, kinda, sorta read that I might have been spray painting in my backyard, in the dark, with a flashlight.

I'm productive like that ya know?

Well here is the finished product. Kinda. What yall think?

Baskets make everything better.

I brought the lamp at a yard sale for $2. It had a brown base and no shingle thingy. Wapow!

Dollar Tree picture frames. Yes. I'm cheap.

Pottery Barn Kids curtains purchased at yard sale for $4. Pottery Barn Kids Flower pegs were $1 each and were white. Little spray paint and Wapow! Picture was $12 at Tar-Jay!

Polk-a-Dot basket. $6 at Tar-Jay. Whoo Hoo!

Pottery Barn Kids Rack $4-5 at yard sale and you know what happened with the spray paint right.....Wapow!

Cork board was $6 at Tar-Jay. Add a little gumdrop purple spray paint. Wapow! I'm just saying.

I'm a little proud of myself. Thanks for asking.

Oh and Thank You Target! I wuv you!

Lessons Learned While On Vacation

Ok, so yall know this is my second week of my vacation.

It was very much needed, seeing as how I was plotting out ways to fake my disappearance so I would never have to go back to my office.

Ahem.

Anyway. It has been a much deserved break. However, I have learned a few things over the last 10 or so days.

1. My husband has the libido of a teenager.

2. He thinks I'm a teenager as well.

3. There is a such thing as spending too much time with your spouse.

4. People cut their grass way to damn early round these parts.

5. You become very nosey about what your neighbors are doing. ( I know who's doing who and when.)

6. You might end up thinking of ways to strangle some people's dogs that can't tell time. Shutthehellupalready!!

7. Some days can fly by while some can drag on like a Soap Opera.

8. You kids will find new ways to drive you batshit crazy.

9. You will start to think work isn't all that bad...

10. You will curse yourself for thinking of #9.

I have a few more fun things coming up before and after I head back to work. Sesame Place this weekend, Myrtle Beach on the 20th and the first day of school for Lael (my first grader!!) on the 24th.

Ok, so that last one is only fun for me. I don't thinks she's too excited.....

Not Me! Monday

Looks what's back! MckMama and her MckFamily are back doing the awesome blog carnival and of course I have to be a part of the fun!

It's been so long. Let see if I can remember how to play along...

I did not let my child go with my step-daughter's mother for a WHOLE WEEK.

I did not hold my breath a little the entire time she was away. I am not paranoid at all thankyouverymuch.

I did not turn into a fake Martha Stewart and fall in love with putting up curtains and spray painting trinkets to hang up.

If I did, I would not spray paint in my backyard, in the dark, with a flashlight. Ahem.

I did not get locked out of my house by my hubby for a good 30 minutes. Because of this I did not lock The Vault and throwing away the key.

I did not take off of work for 2 weeks but still receive phone calls from them.

I did not almost break my broom having a standoff with a wasp in my living room. You can guess who won THAT fight.

I did not cry at my friend Carlota's son's 4th birthday party. I am not a big sap. Nope not me.

I did not agree to go running at 6am this morning and then think of ways to get out of it. I did not feel like I died a little. (Gotta lay off the strawberry ho ho's)

I am not looking forward to my second week off of work to hand with my beautiful girls. I am not going to smother them with love this week!


Happy Monday peeps!

Closed For Renovation

Dear Hubby,

Our child free week together was great.

We drank, shopped, and ate out. It was just like the good old days.

I found my inner freak. You embraced it. What more could we have asked for.

But then the kids came back. And you lost your damn mind.

When do I just jump in the car and drive away and come back a few hours later.

No clue where you went or what you were doing. I don't even care. All I know is you have it easy.

Mom's don't get to just up and go. Me, however, being the good wife that I am, let it go.

It is an unspoken rule that I am the keeper of the kids and you are the keeper of the dogs.

While children were away, I slaved away cleaning the house and shampooing the carpets.

So when your dogs come in and shake SHIT on my walls and carpet I send the bastards back outside and clean it up.

What I am not going to do under any circumstance is WIPESHITOFFYOURDOGSASS.

So when you come home looking for them and wonder why I did not I will look at you crazy.

I let that shit go to. But when I stepped out onto the deck to get some fresh air (because I'd been stuck in the house with YOUR children all day) and you thought it was funny to lock the door and close the curtains, my amusement ceased to exist.

You fucked up. Not just by locking me out there. But by leaving me out there for 30 minutes while my yummy KFC got cold.

I hope you remember all the good loving you got last week baby, because that shit is over.

The Vault will be closed for renovation.

Until further notice. Fucker.

Flashback Friday: Listen To This......

There are certain things that can instantly change the mood you are in. A great song song, talking to a great friend, or hearing the best laugh in the world.

The best sound in my house.

It doesn't take much to set her off. What else is there to say?

(I know the lighting sucks but the sound it what's important)

Originally posted October 16, 2008.

Join ScaryMommy for her Flashback Friday's!

Happy Friday!!