In Which I Will Continue To Whine...Because I Can

I don't think I have anything witty to say.

Being military can really suck sometimes.  One of the sucky factors is that I am a PT monitor.

You know what that means? That means I get to admister a test to make sure Air Force members in my unit are staying fit.  This includes a 1.5 mile run, push-ups, sit-ups, height and weight measurments and taping of the waist.

I don't mind so much doin this.  What I do mind is someone requesting that I do the test at 7am when I don't get to work until 7:30. And then after asking me to do the test at 7am try to talk me into doing it even earlier. 

What the fuck do I look like.

That being said.  I had another night of NO SLEEP.  Went to bed around 9:45.  Didn't fall asleep until after 10 and was up at 1.  That's it.  I could NOT sleep after 1.  Unless you include my 15 min nap around 4:45.  I was back up at 5:30 and out of the house before 6am.

And did I mention is cold as a polar bears balls out? 

In addition to all that's going on, I will NOT, I repeat, NOT, be going home and relaxing when I get off.

Instead Lael will be cheering at her first basketball game at 6pm which means I have to be there at 5:30 to get the girls settled and warmed up.

And do you think I'll be headed home after that?  If you do, you are WRONG.

Lael's usual Saturday gymnastics was moved to tonight at 7pm.

Am I crazy? Do I want to drive myself batshit?

I need a drink, and am not happy that I have to wait until GODKNOWSWHEN to have one.

Maybe I should re-think the whole breastfeeding thing. I mean seriously.  I NEED A DRINK.

That is all for now....

Carry on.

This Morning I Got Pulled Aside By The Police

Well...the Pentagon Police.

In order for you to understand why I should give you a rundown of my morning.

I woke up at 4am (after not being able to fall asleep until after 11:30).  Used the bathroom.  Checked Twitter.  Tried to go back to sleep.

Tried to go back to sleep.

Tried to go back to sleep.

Never fell back asleep and got up to my 6am alarm.  Showered but my husband had stolen my towel.

Got out of shower shivering to get a new one out of the closet.

Got down the stairs only to realize I didn't have anything clean that was comfortable to wear. 

Chose to wear a pair of sweatpants from earlier this week (judge if you may).  Couldn't find matching socks so chose to go without.

Got Lael dressed in some sort of ensamble...not really sure what but I'll find out this afternoon.

Didn't really look to see if her hair was presentable.

Brushed my teeth where my gums began to bleed.

Looked at my watch and realized I was late leaving the house.

Almost fell down the stairs trying to get out of the house quicky.

Had to run/shuffle to catch my shuttle.  I made it.  But I wasn't happy.

I then got to the Metro just in time to catch my train but of course I had to stand up.

The men try not to give eye contact because they would rather die than give up a seat to a woman more or less a pregnant woman.

Then the ladies that don't want to give up a seat decide to bumrush you when the train stops.

Like hell I had to stand up for 3 stops and you think you are going to stand up make me get behind you.

Get to my stop, switch trains, and finally get a seat.  Only because I had to elbow a few people to get there.

Get to my destination and almost got squished trying to get up the escalator because the line to get in the Pentagon was wrapped around to the top of the escaltors.

Then I have to watch people walk past me that try to cut the line.  They do this everyday but I never try it.

Not that I couldn't get away with it but I'm really in no rush to get to my desk.

Finally I have an old guy in a tan trenchcoat behind me that doesn't know the meaning of personal space.

After I snatch my bag and turn around to give him "the look" he aplogizes but barely backs up.

We finally make it into the bldg and he steps on the back of my foot.

At this point I'm about ready to lose it.

That's when I hear "Ma'am, Ma'am!" I turn and the police pulls me aside and asks if everything is ok.

Apparently I committed a crime with my eyes.  Yeah.  I am guilty of kililng this guy with my eyes.

You damn straight I did.  And tomorrow I'll do it all again.

What Being Sick ISN'T Supposed To Mean

I've been sick the past few days. 

It started this weekend with a sore throat.

Then quickly turned into backaches and swollen feet (not sure the two are related).

By Monday I felt like death, and yesterday I felt like I had been brought back to life just to be killed again.

Let's review what should happen when you are sick:

-You should call in sick to work and stay in bed in your pj's.
-Your husband (if he stays home like mine) should pamper you and give you back rubs and hot soup
-Your children will be on their best behavior and make you get well cards

Let's review what did happen:

-I had to drag my ass to work on Monday because no one can do my work
-I had to drag my ass to work on Tuesday (see above)
-I did get to leave work early both days but they acted like they were giving me a prize by doing that
-My husband thinks me coming home early means he can pick me up from the Metro 20 mins late, get daytime sex, nighttime sex, and fondle me as needed
-My child will come home with homework that is review from the beginning of the year and then PRETEND she doesn't remember any of it causing me to hyperventilate because I am THAT angry

I am feeling much better. Thankyouverymuch.

So what did I learn from all of this?

I don't know, but I sure as hell am thankful to Benadryl.

Some Sunday's Come Too Soon

She counts down the days until we get her again.

Every other week the countdown to Friday begins.

She keeps secrets just for her.

She has a special laugh that only she can get out of her.

They rarely fight, not wanting to waist a precious moment they have together.

Sunday usually comes too fast.

Before there were tears, now there is just silence.

She is growing up and dealing.

But it breaks my heart everytime.

To have a part-time sibling is hard on any child.

They had an awesome weekend.  Manicures, pedicures, dinner, movies, a night at Grandma's.

Then as quickly as it began it's over.

She is an only child again.

At least for 12 more days.

While I know this baby in my belly won't fill that void, I will force myself to believe that it will lessen the pain.

To have a sibling that will always be there.  Even when she may want him to go away.  He won't.

He will be here.  Everyday.  Every weekend.  Her brother.  Full time.

Oh how I wish I could make it different.

While I know it will make her strong in the end it still breaks my heart when the week without her sister begins.

23 Weeks

Guess who is 6 months preggos?  I know!  Ok well technically I don't start my 6th month until tomorrow but if you are going to be that anal than go away.  Just kidding. :)

So far everything has been well.  For those that missed it, it is a boy.  NO QUESTION ABOUT IT.  Except for my one incident everything has been great.

Everyone I see swears I am little and carrying so well.  That's just code for "girl your ass gonna blow up from here".  Thanks for that.

So I have decided to schedule a C-Section.  I know it's not what I said earlier but I am 100% sure.

The first thing that led to this decicison was that the doctor reviewed my records from Lael's birth and decided that while my previous C-Section was difficult that I had a 60-80% chance of having a vaginal birth without my uterus errupting.

While to some that sounds all warm and fuzzy.  I was concered about whether I fell in the 60th percentile or the 80th. 

But what really sealed the deal is the last weekend D was with us she asked who was going to take care of her and Lael when I had Bubby (no he still doesn't have a name but feel free to give suggestions. Preferably names that start with L or K). 

It then hit me that most likely D wouldn't be with us when I went into labor and I don't want her to meet her brother a week after he is born.

I know it may sound stupid to some but she is my daughter as well.  This is her brother.  I want her there as much as I want Lael and Hubby there and so I have decided to let the doctors slice me once more the ensure that both of my girls are the first to meet the last member of this family.

So, I spoke to D's mom and she totally supports this and will let her miss school if needed to be there.  It certainly kicks ass to have a baby momma that has some sense.

My next appt is on Feb 12th, so I will let me doctor know my decision.  I don't know if she will schedule it then or how that works but when I find out my date I will totally let my bloggy buddies know.

Well, I'm past the half-way point.  I have started working on his room and Lael is enjoying it.  He has clothes, a bassinett and stroller/carseat combo (thanks to my little brother in Iraq), and thanks to Buckeroomama a bouncy seat. 

I'm sure my babyshower (April 17th) will turn out great and I will get lots more stuff for him.

I am scared, excited, and giddy.

I'm having a baby.

He'll be here before I know it.

I don't even know how to take care of a boy.

I guess I'll find out soon enough.

True Colors

He usually get's on my last nerve.

I love him and that is probably why he can get right under my skin.

He can be lazy slob and it infuriates me.

He does have many good qualities.

He adores animals.  He's great with all children (you know, cuz he never grew up).  And he has this little magic power.

The power to make people laugh.  His humor could probably get him out of any situation.

But this week there was a side of him I never saw before.

Compassion.

From the moment the fire started at our neighbors house, something in him switched.

It was like a light bulb.

A side of him I had never seen in the 10 years we've been together.

The fire happend on a Friday night and Saturday morning he doned his sweats and work boots and trudged throught the ashes to help salvage what they could.

He did the same thing Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday.  Working non-stop from the morning until dusk to save what he can.

Taking out furniture.  Offering to fix the tv's.  He even ordered an X-Box 360 from Ebay and cleaned it up to give to their teenage son.

Coming home covered in soot.  Not once has he complained.  Not a once.

He has amazed me.

I have always known that he was a good person.

I have always know that your heart can expand to allow more love than you can imagine.

What I didn't know was that your love for a person can completely change.

It will never be the same.  I will never look at him the same.

My husband showed his True Colors and for that I will love him forever and always...and a little bit more.

Cuz I'm A Sucker

So last night was Lael's first day of Cheerleading practice.  If any of you have been hanging around long enough to remember, I was the assistant coach last year of about 15 5-7 yr old girls.

Yeah. I know.

So Saturday when I signed her up (at the last minute) the Youth Center Director thought he was slick and tired to slide coaching papers towards me.

I protested at first but then found out that there was only one coach so far.  I decided to sign up as as and assistant coach again but insisted that the moment I got overtired I was going to sit my pregnant ass down.

So back to last night.  Me and a few other parents are there for our 6pm practice but others show up saying it's at 6:30.  The coach hadn't shown up yet and I was slowly getting pissy.

Finaly at 6:20 she shows up.  No idea how she told half of us one time and the other half another time.  In addition to that, there were girls of all ages, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10.  That didn't seem right.  Well I found out that she was the coach for both teams.

Well that shit wasn't going to work.

The military Youth Sports program is ran by volunteer parents.  No volunteers. No coaches. No team.

So long story short, me and the other mom who coached the 5-7 group last year will be coaching again this year.  Except I had to talk the other mom into it which means I'm the head coach.  Huh?

How'd that happen?

I know.  I'm a sucker.