I have decided that I don't really like many people. Don't get me wrong. I like people, just not many.
Actually very few people.
Being in the military I am exposed to so many different people in a short amount of time.
The office that I work at I've been in for 2 years. In those 2 years I am the only one left. I've been there through 2 different bosses, 6 peers, 2 supervisors, and countless other co-workers that have rotated out.
Because of this constant rotation there are always new people coming in and new people being introduced.
I am not that interested. I don't care for introduction or who they are.
While everyone around me jumps up to shake hands, smile, and tell their life stories, I don't.
I just want to be left alone to do my work and go home.
Don't get me wrong. I eventually get around to meeting the people and usually end up liking them.
It's the getting there part that's tricky.
I didn't really come to terms with this until Friday.
In the past I've had many friends that said when they first met me they thought I was snotty, stuck up, or a bitch.
Most have admitted that they were wrong. Some may still believe it to be trust. Whatever.
While talking with one of my co-workers Friday, we were talking about first impressions and I told her that I liked her from the beginning.
She jumped onto the honesty bandwagon and revealed that when she first met me she that I was uppity.
Nice.
I decided to walk around with my other co-workers and get their opinions. They ALL said the same thing.
They claim to all love me now but I scared them away in the beginning.
I think I have come up with the reason behind it.
I don't have very many friends. Don't get me wrong, I've gone through lots of them, but very few that have stuck.
Because of this I am very cautious of people now. I used to be very bubbly when I first met people. Tell them my business, give them my trust and open up to them.
After being hurt and disappointed so many times I now have a guard up.
Long story short. I'm a bitch. At least when you first meet me.
Now go away. I'm busy. :o)
I have a friend who summed things up for me so well that I've started using it myself.
ReplyDeleteOne day she looked at me and said "well you know, the only reason I make friends is so that I don't have to make new ones.
first impressions can be hard to get over but for those who stick it out, they usually find someone worth knowing, as you said it's the middle part that is tricky
There are some people in my office I'd like to punch...
ReplyDeleteI can relate. My best work friend says that I was a horror show when we first met--icy and uppity. Now he adores me. And not just because I give him my lunch money.
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure I strike many as stand-offish... for those who do not know me. I know I can be. Depends on what time of the month it is! :p
ReplyDeleteDont worry you are not alone! I have been told numerous times that i come off as a bitch, snotty, uppity, or any other word that in the end just plain means bitch! I too dont have a lot of friends. I have been burned too many time and now have the armoured wall built around me.
ReplyDeleteI have one best friend (which i call my sister) who has survived 8 years now. We love each other and have been through it all. We call each other out and let each other know when one is not acting up to par. Are kids are best friends and we hang out as often as possible (with both our busy schedules). She is a rock for me and I for her. Compared to her i find it hard to make new friends.
That is why i love blogging because people get to know the real me without having the first impressions stand in the way.
What a bitch!! LOL! j/k
ReplyDeleteI guess it's harder for some to start getting to know other people. I think it all depends.
My bf sounds EXACTLY the same way you do!! He says he is not interested in meeting other people and when he finally does have to talk to someone he is like ok well they aren't that bad. lol
And I think you are right, we should not open up to people right away we don't know their real intentions.
I guess you should confine yourself to Twitter only, cause you're damned hospitable if you ask me!
ReplyDelete;)
I think it's totally normal to be guarded, especially at first. If people take that a certain way, maybe they aren't very confident. Just sayin.'
ReplyDeleteThat as much summarizes up what your are like :) Sweet enough to get to know you... a guard up is essential only true relationships can see through this
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I, for one, love people like you. People who surprise me with who they really are instead of what they may seemingly project.
ReplyDeleteI think you might be my twin.
ReplyDelete