I am finally at a stage in my life where I am just figuring out who I am.
I have decided that I don't really like many people. Don't get me wrong. I like people, just not many.
Actually very few people.
Being in the military I am exposed to so many different people in a short amount of time.
The office that I work at I've been in for 2 years. In those 2 years I am the only one left. I've been there through 2 different bosses, 6 peers, 2 supervisors, and countless other co-workers that have rotated out.
Because of this constant rotation there are always new people coming in and new people being introduced.
I am not that interested. I don't care for introduction or who they are.
While everyone around me jumps up to shake hands, smile, and tell their life stories, I don't.
I just want to be left alone to do my work and go home.
Don't get me wrong. I eventually get around to meeting the people and usually end up liking them.
It's the getting there part that's tricky.
I didn't really come to terms with this until Friday.
In the past I've had many friends that said when they first met me they thought I was snotty, stuck up, or a bitch.
Most have admitted that they were wrong. Some may still believe it to be trust. Whatever.
While talking with one of my co-workers Friday, we were talking about first impressions and I told her that I liked her from the beginning.
She jumped onto the honesty bandwagon and revealed that when she first met me she that I was uppity.
I decided to walk around with my other co-workers and get their opinions. They ALL said the same thing.
They claim to all love me now but I scared them away in the beginning.
I think I have come up with the reason behind it.
I don't have very many friends. Don't get me wrong, I've gone through lots of them, but very few that have stuck.
Because of this I am very cautious of people now. I used to be very bubbly when I first met people. Tell them my business, give them my trust and open up to them.
After being hurt and disappointed so many times I now have a guard up.
Long story short. I'm a bitch. At least when you first meet me.
Now go away. I'm busy. :o)
Two decades later
18 hours ago