Tuesday, August 4, 2009

In Which I Talk About Sex (*Gasp*)

Yeah I'm gonna go there.

Lael's been gone for 4 days now.

I've accomplished a lot. Some things that were on my list some things not.

Most of you know we decided to try for another baby. Most of you also know that I've already had my IUD taken out for a month and a half.

Ok. Let me talk to you about this.

Before I had Lael it was just me and Hubby (surprise!). I worked shift work and we liked to have sex.

All.The.Time. I would take a lunch break to get busy. I went in late to get busy. I skipped PT to get busy. You get the point right?

After I had Lael, most getting busy ceased to exist. I had lost it. That youthful sex drive went away.

I didn't want him to see me naked more or less touch me. It wasn't good.

This has been our #1 argument in my house. How I don't give it up enough.

I tried to do better. I faked a few moans and groans and he thought he was doing something. (Oh, shut up you all have done it before.)

Well, since I've had the IUD out I have felt the little freak in me creep back. I've had more of an urge than I've had in 5 years.

Now don't get me wrong. There are still a few...ahem...stunts, that he would like me to perform but kinda uh gross me out.

A few nights ago a few friends gave me some pointers. I figured with Lael being gone it would be perfect to bring some new tricks out of (like my friend puts it) "The Vault".

I'm pretty sure that was a mistake. I think he's lost his fucking mind.

I think he thinks I'm one of those sluts on the Adult Channels. I advise you that I am not.

Now I pray that Lael comes back soon. I have to swat him off of me every few seconds.

One "trick" I pulled out last week he hasn't gotten over. He keeps bringing it up. I mean seriously. It's over!

Moral of the story: Keep your tricks IN "The Vault". Otherwise, your head will never go straight to the pillow in your bed again.


9 comments:

  1. It's never a bad thing to spice things up. lol

    But you've turned the switch back on him again, it's gonna take a while to turn it back off. Enjoy it though.;)

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  2. Too funny!!! Having kids just kills the drive in my experience. Sounds like the Vault is a double edged sword... so to speak

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  3. hehe!! Sex is our pretty much only fight. HELLO?! We have 3 kids now and one is 10, one almost 7 and the other almost 4. He just doesn't get why we can't do it in the middle of the day. DUH!!

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  4. That is the FUNNIEST reason I've ever read for wanting your child to return home early. (And PS: I'm super jealous that you got your inner freak back. Come to think about it, mine returned when I wanted to get knocked up, too. There's GOT to be a way to get it back that doesn't result in a child.)

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  5. Oh girl do i know what you mean! We had 2 kids 13 months apart and our (well mine) sex drive went out the window! I like you had an IUD. When i had it taken out back in January i found my sex drive again which leads me to believe the IUD could have taken much of the blame for it going missing.

    Good luck TTC and i cant wait to hear some great news!

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  6. So, the other night, we got our freak back on and I must say - I was impressed.

    Nothing wrong with that!

    Just don't forget to lock the door when Lael comes back!

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  7. Well~~I am glad that I convienced you to open the "VAULT"! Now the key to managing the vault is to use what's in it to your advantage~ :0)!!!

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  8. Good to know the urge is back. Sex is very important to maintain after kids and yet so so hard. Congrats to your husband on getting some

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  9. "I tried to do better. I faked a few moans and groans and he thought he was doing something. (Oh, shut up you all have done it before.)"

    ROFLMAO!!!!! So true!!!

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Those laughing with me...or at me.