I know I've talked about how different this pregnancy is from Lael's. Being older. Being experienced. Having my friends and family excited for me. It is nice.
But it all seem so surreal to me. Is my belly really growing before my eyes? Is there really a baby inside of me?
I don't know if it's ok to get really excited. I freaked out last week when I noticed a light pink spotting. Thanks to all my virtual friends for giving me kind words and supporting me durning my panic.
It all went away. No cramps or any other problems but is everything ok?
I have my first appointment tomorrow. Will they be able to get a heartbeat? Can you even hear the heartbeat at 8 weeks?
I haven't got my flu shot. I'm afraid. I'm afraid that it will kill my baby. Did I tell you all that I am RH Negative? Do you know what that is? Basically my body recognizes the baby as a threat and tries to fight it off. Yeah. I'm not even kidding.
I walk in the stores and refuse to look at the baby clothes. I'm think I'm afraid to get too excited. I'm afraid to grab a pack of onsies because I don't know what I would do if I never got to use them.
I don't remember being this afraid with Lael. What is wrong with me?
Maybe my appointment will give me the relief and security that I need.
It's going to be a long 8 months. I hope you guys are with me for the ride.