Tonight was really hard for me. With La turning 5 next week I've set my mind on giving her "real" punishment when she acts up especially in school. At the beginning of the school year I laid down the rules and swore to stay consistent.
A few months into the school year and she's been doing great. There have been 1 or 2 "pink" cards but a long stretch of "green". I figured she has matured alot and we were going to have a good year. La is a really good girl but I know with her if I give her an inch she'll take a mile.
All last year she got mostly "green" but surely had her share of "pinks" but never "blue" or "yellow". She hasn't had anything worse than "pink" this year either. Until today.
I came home from work and she met me at the door with the news. She got....a....BLUE card today. WTH! I couldn't believe it. My baby had never had to be warned more than a few times but never lost recess time. I didn't know what to do. I have a really hard time disciplining her because she's mah baby!
Today was different. I knew I had let it slide too many times and she was testing the water. I was invited to my girlfriends house for dinner where me and La frequent. She loves playing with her kids and asks everyday to go there. Originally I had planned to grab La and run over for dinner before I went grocery shopping. But once I got word of her behavior of the day I knew I had to make it known that I mean business.
I explained to her that I wasn't going to reward her for bad behavior and I left. Yup, mom that never goes anywhere but work and the gym without her sidekick left her home with dad. She couldn't believe it and fell out crying. I almost cried myself and had to close the door behind me before I gave in. I don't know if anyone else understands but I have such a connection with my baby and when she's upset if physically pains me. To have her crying out for me was excruciating. I had a good dinner and talked it out with my friend who gave me lots of encouragement.
When I got home, she was sitting on the floor and her eyes were swollen. She came to me and we talked some more. She cried and cried and cried and I cried with her and I explained that I love her but I want her to grow up following the rules and to be a good honest person. I know she young and it may be hard to understand now but if I don't start while she's young I'm afraid she'll be a spoiled brat and I want her to be spoiled, but within reason.
Maybe I'm going about it all wrong. Once again, I'm new at this. It's like closing pinning the tail on the donkey, close your eyes and hope you hit it on the tail.
Two decades later
11 hours ago