8 Is The Magic Number

I finally found the cord to my camera.  Yeah.  It had been THAT long since I uploaded pictures.

So,  word on the street is Lael turned 8.  How the hell did that happen?

Also, Kobi is 18 months today.  Seriously.  I know.  I haven't posted a picture of him since he turned one.

Sorry.

He is really super cute though.  And a busy body.  And did I mention cute?  Just checking.

So remember when I had planned to take Lael to the American Girl store in New York for her birthday?  Yeah, probably not, but follow along anyway.  So I was supposed to but then something very much so cooler happened.  They opened one her in the DC area.  I immediately made reservations and had been keeping it a total secret the entire summer (the very busy summer which I will catch yall up on soon). 

We got snow on her birthday here in DC.  On October 29th.  Seriously.  We couldn't believe it either but I sure didn't let that stop the birthday festivities.

We got to Tyson's Corner Mall which is where the store was and she was super annoyed that her big surprise was going the mall.  It was hilarious.

As we were walking along she noticed a few girls carrying American Girl bags but still didn't put two and two together.

I swear, that place was the cutest thing I've ever seen.  There was so much pink and sparkle I could die.

It was also very pricey.  The grandparents were all generous enough to pitch in so I was able to easily pay for our birthday lunch package, get Lael a new doll and many accessories.

Here are a few pictures from our festivities.

It was a wonderful day.  Afterwards we went bowling here on base were Lael ended the night by winning the costume contest and getting an iPod Shuffle.  I know.

Halloween post to come soon!

Where did the time go?

So the last time y'all heard from me Kobi had just turned 1. Well now he's creeping up on 18 months. Lael just turned 8 and I recently hit the big 30. Life has been overwhelmingly busy. I'm taking two college courses and juggling work, sports and everything else that comes along with motherhood. I'm very happy but just too busy to enjoy it sometimes. I know all my hard work will be rewarding some day. I miss you all. I miss reading your stories and laughing at your comments. I'm ready to be back. I'm not really sure how I stopped. It's like a part of me has been missing the past six months or so. Time flies by.

I'll be back soon with pictures and stories. Soon, I promise!

So Now He's 1

Kobi turned 1 on the 14th. I am still having a hard time grasping the concept. I remember being pregnant not that long ago wondering how I would ever love a baby as much as I love Lael.

Somehow your heart stretches. You don't love one child a little less to make room for another. Your heart just gets bigger.

On the morning of his birthday, the girls wanted to have a little private celebration before all the guests arrived.

Even with bedhead they manage to be adorable.

The party was supposed to be at a picnic area but of course the weather didn't cooperate.

Of course I didn't let that stop our celebration. I rubbed the house down with Magic Erasers and sent everyone a notice that the party had been relocated to my house.

I made this photo garland that was a big hit. Thanks to my friend Beth for writing a quick tutorial post for it.

Because I wanted his party to be extra special, I also stole and idea to make his birthday banner.  It came out much better than I expected.

This is the cake that I had orginally ordered. Originally I ordered a photo cake that had the same picture as his invitations. I was a little annoyed the machine was broke but I got over it.

Kobi had his own little cake. So cute.

He loved it!

One of my neighbors came over and brought her two little girls. At some point she asked me if I wanted her to do facepainting. Sure I said a little confused.

The last time I checked she was in home daycare provider. Apparently the week befor she taught herself to facepaint from YouTube. Who knew.

Kobi had a spiderweb and spider. I mean seriously. How cute is he?

Even though his party wasn't as I planned it turned out better than I could have ever imagined. I am so proud to be his mama.

Happy 1st Birthday Kobi Dobi!

Emotions

Hi friends.

I know it's been a while. I have missed you. The whole 5 of y'all that still read my abandoned blog.

Life has been a whirlwind and I can't seem to steady myself. Lots has happened in the past few weeks.

Let me break it down in no particular order.

Mother's Day: It was a great day. I pretty much stayed home and relaxed. Hubby made me breakfast in the morning and that afternoon we had a picnic with the kids where we were almost attacked by pigeons for our lunchables (classy aren't we?). Later hubby made me dinner. It was lovely except the part where I spoke to my mother. It was great to hear her voice and I sure do miss her. I haven't seen her since December and she lives like 30 minutes away. But that's beside the point.  We chatted for a while and I asked her about my youngest brother.  I hadn't heard from him in about a month. He’s usually good about calling every few weeks and is always on Facebook obsessively. Well I found out why he's been so quiet.

My brother is in jail: My throat closes up just typing that. He is 19 and is the sweetest boy at heart but can't manage to stay out of trouble. He is being charged with some really serious crimes and my heart feels like it's literally breaking. 

I got promoted:  If you’ve read my blog for a while you know that I’ve tested quite a few times with no success.  I was starting to think it would never happen.  Traditionally the results would come out in June for those that scored high enough.  However, I got promoted under a different program.  Basically they do a narrative write up of your career and submit it to a board.  The board picks the ones that they thing are hot shit and they get promoted immediately.  Yes.  Apparently I’m hot shit.  I got a phone call on Tuesday night at home from a 2-star general telling me that I had been selected.  I had to scramble to get new stripes sewn on my uniform but I managed. It’s still unbelievable.  It also comes with a pay raise (around 300 bucks a month I think) so that’s awesome.

My supervisor is retiring: Ugh.  I’ve only been here 8 months and she’s leaving me.  We technically she’s moving across the hall in a non-military position but still the same, she’s leaving me.  This means that I have to take on her duties until they replace her.  Unless they decide I’m the one to replace her because I just got promoted.  Which means they may find someone to replace me.  Which means I will be a supervisor.  Which means OHMYGOD don’t have enough to do already?

I started writing this post yesterday and I was going to tell you all how my dog has been sick.

Well between yesterday and today she has passed away.

My dog died: I had my Cockapoo (Cocker Spaniel and Poodle mix) dog Princess since the summer before I started 10^th grade.  That means I’ve had her just about 15 years.  That’s a long life for a dog.  My dog.  She recently picked her leg and it became a sore.  We cleaned it and wrapped it but she kept picking at it.  We took her in yesterday and for some reason she had developed and infection in her leg which is why she kept picking at it.  It must have been painful.  Between her losing her eyesight, her hearing and just being plain old they decided it would be in her best interest to put her down.

And so it was done.  It’s amazing how quickly the whole process went.  They vet hospital team was very professional and very sweet.  They thanked me for taking such good care of her and bringing her in so that she wasn’t in pain.  But it makes my heart sad.  I can’t remember her NOT being around. And now I look at her water bowl and her leash and feel like a part of our family is missing.

You don’t realize how much animals are a part of your family until you lose one of them.  We haven’t told Lael yet.  She knew Princess wasn’t feeling well and she had been spending time in daddy’s man-cave.  She hasn’t asked about her and I think I’ll wait until next week when we pick up her ashes to tell her.  She’s going to be devastated.  Do y'all remember how she was when Boots died?  Exactly.

Kobi will be 1!:I am full of so many emotions and on top of everything my baby will be one on Saturday.  How did this happen?  How could y'all have let this happen??

I am excited for his party but sad at the same time.  So many things are going on.  I find myself daydreaming more than usual.  I just need things to slow down.  Just a bit.

All I Need Is A Frame

She did it.



All the hard work has finally paid off.  I was so proud that I burst into tears.  As long as I've had this blog I've talked about the report cards that broke my heart.

But she did it.

She kicked the 3rd advisory period's ass.  I'm so proud of her.  Now that she has a taste of the Honor Roll she wants to keep it up. 

She did it!

11 Months

So here we are Kobi. Counting down to your first birthday.

You are such a big boy. There are so many new things to touch on. You've graduated from your infant car seat. Today you had your first ride in big boy style. I think you kind of dug it.

You have finally grasped the concept of the sippy cup. I knew you could. You just don't like being rushed into things.

You can stand on your own now. Yes, you can but you are really quite lazy and don't stand longer than necessary. You're such a tease.

Baby food is pretty much a thing of the past. You refuse to eat anything but the real thing. You also do this thing were I put food in your mouth and you take it out, look at it and then decide if you want it. Silly boy.

You love repeating me. When I say cheese you give the goofiest grin and say "sheeee". You pretty much have Mama and Dada down but use them only when necessary.

I am planning your first birthday. My heart aches just a bit but it swells more with pride. I still can't believe I have a son. My boy. Mama's baby.

I took you to the park today do a photoshoot. You climbed and crawled and enjoyed the sun on your face. We were alone for a while but then a mom came with her two kids. She had an older daughter and a boy maybe a little over a year. You were sitting and across from them staring. She was one of those cute moms. You know the kind that look like they never had kids. I stared wishing I had that body. Before I knew it you power crawled over to her and she helped you stand up. Then. You slapped her.

I pretended to be mortified and she laughed it off. But when she wasn't looking I totally high fived you. We are have lots of adventures ahead of us my boy. Happy 11 months!

Brain Waves

I don’t think I posted here about it but I’m sure I tweeted about Kobi’s “thing”. So, for the past few months he does this head tilt. He leans his head to the right and lifts his right should up simultaneously. All day at random times. At first we thought it was just something cute but we then decided it was something weird. He was do it his highchair, when we’re holding him, when he’s playing, etc. No specific time of day or during a certain act. We tried not to make a big deal about it but continued to watch him closely.

When I took him in for his 9 month checkup, we brought it up to his Pediatrician. Right when we were explaining it, he proceeded to show her himself. Quite a few times actually. She took notice of it. She checked his ears and they were clear. No ear infection. She checked his eyes and they seemed fine as well. She told us not to get worked up about it but to keep an eye on it.

No sooner that I had got back to work later that day, I had an email from her. I guess it bothered her enough that she asked a few colleagues and they didn’t seem OVERLY concerned but thought it would be safe to send me to a Pediatric Neurologist.

So, that’s where we ended up last Wednesday. We had 3 doctors in the room. They did the usual check of his weight and head circumference. Then they asked us one million questions. We explained that he still did the “thing” but it seems to be more often now. They poked and prodded. He giggled and babbled. They checked his reflexes, is strength, this length, his motor skills. Everything seemed fine.

Then they saw him do the “thing”. They all kind of looked at each other. They all went out to discuss the possibilities and brought in the real doctor. It was like a scene from House where the other doctors try to figure things out on their own and when they are baffled the big dawg comes in with all his expertise. Except our doctor was old. Really old. But didn’t have the cane like House, or the sarcasm. No, he was a really sweet old man and seemed to know what he was talking about.

He thinks that it just may be one of Kobi’s quirks. If so, I’m ok with that. But he did say that we have to give my son an EEG. They will hook him up to a machine that will monitor is brain waves. Scary. He said that they want to rule out any silent or mini seizures.

Yes please, let’s go ahead and rule that out. I was worried that I wouldn’t get an appointment for weeks but turns out they wanted to get him in quickly. I don’t know if I should be worried or relieved. So, either way his appointment is Wednesday. Wish us luck and perfect brain wave activity.

Also, any of you ever experience anything like this? What was the outcome?

Wordless Wednesday

He's a mess. Literally.

That Mom

I am that mom.

I am that mom that loses control sometimes.

I am that mom that spoils her child.

I am that mom that’s over protective.

I am that mom care’s about her child’s appearance.

I am that mom that keeps her child involved.

I am that mom that will confront you.

I am that mom that chaperones field trips.

I am that mom that fills up your inbox.

I am that mom that does her research.

I am that mom that has military training.

I am that mom that believes in second chances.

I am that mom that will ride the school bus to make my child feel safe.

I am that mom that will NOT tolerate bullying

I am that mom that will rip your fucking head off.

I am proud to be THAT MOM…and I’ll see you on the bus this afternoon.

Wordless Wednesday

We went to a Princess Party a few weeks ago. They rolled out a red carpet and took shots of each of the girls. She cleans up well huh?

Sleep

If you all have been following my blog for a while you will know that I am not one of those moms that brought the baby home from the hospital and let them sleep in the bassinet or crib.

No.

I am the mom that attempts the crib or bassinet but am to chicken shit to follow through.

Lael slept in the bed with me until she was 5. 5 people. Who does that? That mean that when I finally decided to break her of it (at my husbands’ request/threats) she was old enough to tell me where to shove that idea.

But I did it. She is now 7 and still bargains her way into my bed on the weekends or school holidays.

Now enter Kobi.

I was DETERMINED to do things the right way this time. I started off great at the hospital. I would swaddle his little ass and put him in that hard plastic bassinet. When I got him home I followed through with it. And then he realized that my bed was more comfortable. Especially if he was in my bed snuggled under my armpit.

All it took was one night of sleep and he promptly turned his nose up to the bassinet. But he was too little for the crib (in my opinion). So what did I do? I let him sleep with me every night.

I know.

Around 5 or 6 months I tried to put him in his crib. I decided to “attempt” the Cry It Out method. That was bullshit (in my opinion). I just couldn’t do it. He wasn’t happy. I wasn’t happy. It was not good, so back to my bed he came.

I decided to wait for him to get a little older. Finally at 8 months I decided to try again. He did much better. There wasn’t much of a fuss. He would sleep for about 3 hrs in there. Progress.

Initially I would put him to bed around 9:30. He would sleep until 1:00. After a few weeks I moved it to 9:00. He still slept until 1:00. Then I decided to get feisty and moved it to 8:30. He slept until 3:30. This went on for a few weeks and I was happy about the process. Of course each time he woke in the wee hours of the morning I would bring him into bed with me.

Then last month I decided that 8:00 was a better bedtime. I crossed my fingers and hoped for the best. He went down easily but still woke at 3. That is until the second night in. He slept from 8-6. Non-stop. I couldn’t believe it.

That only happened once but since then I’ve stuck with our routine. Dinner, bath, bed. He knows the routine. Then a few nights ago he decided he didn’t like it anymore. Actually he decided he didn’t like sleep anymore at all. I don’t know if it was a growth spurt or his new tooth but things were getting ugly.

Down at 8, up at 11, then again at 2, then 5, then 6, then 7:30. The past few days had been U-G-L-Y.

Then we enter last night. I put him down around 8:30 and then I woke at 3 and he wasn’t next to me. He was still in his crib. Knocked out. I debated on letting him continue to sleep, but my throbbing boob decided he needed to eat.

I woke him and fed him and then changed him. Just when I was going to carry him to my bed I changed my mind. I decided to put him back in his crib.

I went back to bed around 3:30 and flipped though the tv for a few minutes.

Then I woke up at 7. I had fell asleep. Wait. Did Kobi stay asleep?

Yes. Yes he did.

Last night was the first night he did not sleep in my bed at ALL.

A girl could get used to this.

Flawed Mother

Lael’s been having a hard time lately.

The newness of having a baby brother has officially worn off. While she does love him and love playing with him, the jealousy bug has set in.

She’s been acting up lately and I’ve been coming down on her hard. I don’t even recognize the child she has been lately. Talking back, deliberately ignoring me, doing the opposite of what I tell her to, rolling her eyes, huffy breathing. I’m used to her showing out here and there but it’s been a little out of control.

My first thoughts are always, “it’s a phase”, but I thought a little harder about it this time. I had to figure out what was really bothering her.

Then the other night, I snapped. I had had enough. She pushed me to my limit and I spanked her. I haven’t spanked her in a very long time. I had given up on spanking. Swore it off forever.

I was wrong. While her actions were completely out of control, how were mine any better?

Later that evening we snuggled in bed and we talked. She cried about how everything is about Kobi. She explained how she was upset that she was the small cute one anymore. That she always has to be quiet because he’s sleeping. We can’t do certain things because Kobi is too small. Kobi, Kobi, Kobi.

She broke down in tears and my heart hurt. This is the exact opposite of what I wanted to happen. I wanted her to feel the love of having a sibling at home full time. I wanted her to learn the responsibility of helping out.

I once again question my decision. Have I ruined her. She told me that she doesn’t want Kobi to get in the middle of our love and friendship. What do you say to that? I was speechless.

I need to do better. I am filled with so much guilt. If she only knew how much I love her. How nothing could ever take away the joy she has given me. How I am a better mother to Kobi because of what she has taught me.

She’s too young to understand now but I hope one day she will.

In the meantime, I hope she’s forgiving of me.

Moms are flawed too.

Wordless Wednesday

If you look close enough you can see the curl on Michael's forehead.  That picture is the best.

10 Months

Ten Months. That's two hands, ten fingers.

We had your 9 month checkup last week. You are 20lbs and 28 1/2 inches. Growing just like you should.

We saw the cardiologist before your pediatrician and you are in the clear. No more heart appointments. It's such a relief!

The last few weeks have been a blur.

You've learned so many new "tricks" in such a short time.

You can now shake your head "no". It's quite funny. I think you purposely do things you shouldn't just to hear me say "no" so you can shake your cute little head and smile at me.

You say "mama". Your dad argues that you aren't really saying it but you only say it when I am home.

You love peek-a-boo. Not like before when you giggled at me. Now you like to be the one doing the hiding. You lean your head down or put a blanket over your head then pop up real fast. I die from cuteness overload every time.

You are a champ crib sleeper now. I'm glad I waited for you to get older. You are set in your routine and you don't put up a fuss.

You are still nursing. Well, that's more of an accomplishment for me. Anyway, the problem is you have zero interest in a sippy cup. Zero.

You love Lael. Like seriously. Even more than you love her you love her hair. You have made pulling her beads your new favorite pastime. When I'm doing her hair you pick up the brush to help.

You love to eat. Anything. Everything. It's a challenge for me to eat around you. But I like that you aren't picky.

You are a speed crawler. The baby gate stays up 24/7. And now you've learned to climb on things. Dude. Slow down. There's time for that later.

You have brought so much joy to this house. Your laughter. The way you squeal when I come home. The way you mock the sounds I make.

I'm so in love with you. Especially how much you made me laugh during our photo shoot. You giggled every time the camera flashed.

Such a goofy goober.