The Holidays Kicked My Ass....

.....and my computer.

It's dead. I've had no e energy to type up a whole post with my thumbs on iPod or BB.

As I sit here thumbing this, I am in my pjs. I have been since Saturday. I mean I did shower and put new ones on but I haven't left the house.

I go back to work Wednesday and have no intentions of putting on real clothes before then.

Christmas was nice and quiet over here. Lael got everything she wanted (minus the hamster) and
that was all I cared about. Santa even dropped off a few things for D and Kobi.

We ate leftovers, played XBox Kinect, took naps and ate some more.

I hope your holiday has been filled with laziness like mine has. Well, only if you like that sort of thing.

**I can't post pics for a while but when I do it'll be worth
it.**

The Dreamhouse

Every year there is that one hot Christmas item that drives me crazy.

The past few years have been especially difficult because, well, we’re broke.

I mean I know we are ALL broke but I’m broke broke.

So you can imagine my pain when Lael and D both put the Barbie Dream Townhouse on their lists last year. It was around $145.

If you remember, we ended up getting both of the girls DSI’s so the Barbie house didn’t make the cut.

So, naturally when Lael gave me her list this year that damn house was on the top of the list again.

Then I was torn. Torn because it was on her sister’s list again.

Then I told my brother about it.

Him being the hero that he is (figuratively and literally) , he decided to help me pay for it.

I decided to leave the guilt behind me because the fact it Lael deserves it and I’m going to make sure she gets it and deal with everything else later.

So then began the hunt.

Apparently Wal-Mart sold it for $125 but they were sold out.

Target had it going for $130 but they were sold out.

Toys R Us had it in stock but for $179.

Amazon had it in stock for $159.

Damn. I obsessively checked these websites over the last few days waiting for them to restock or put them on sale.

So after talking to my brother I decided to order from Amazon before they ran out.

I went online to order but decided to check Target one more time.

Guess what?

They had them in stock. And on sale.

On sale for $123. And get this: FREE SHIPPING!!!

But it gets better.

I remembered that Lael’s godfather had sent her a $50 gift card so I applied that and my brother only had to pay around 80 bucks.

I feel like I just made Target and Mattel my bitches.

Even though I didn’t.

But if feels like it.

The point is I’m going to have one happy little girl on Christmas morning. (or later depending on the delivery date which ranged from Dec 21st-Jan 6th)

And because I awesome l’m gonna give my brother all the credit.

I know, I’m like a saint or something.

What I Say SHOULD Go

Being a parent can be hard. We all know this. Being a step-parent can be really hard.

There are always times when a child will try to play one parent against the other and more times when they try to play the grandparents against the parents.

But what am I supposed to do when the step-child plays the step-mom against the mother-in-law.

Pull my hair out is what I want to do.

Let me explain.

D is the first grandbaby. Naturally she will be the shining star. The fact that she isn’t here on a regular basis makes the spoiling that much worse.

She gets away with more than I see necessary from all parties involved.

But as she approaches 9 and Lael is learning habits from here I am becoming fed up with some of the behavior.

Quite often me and the kids will drive to the MIL’s house and stay the night. We’ll watch movies and order pizza and just enjoy each other’s company.

But mostly every time we are together at my MIL’s, D feels that she can do what she wants.

What doesn’t help is that my MIL doesn’t seem to notice that we are being played.

Case and Point:

I tell the girls to put on their pajamas and then they can play/watch a movie, etc.

I go upstairs and see Lael doing what I said but where is D? In her grandmothers room showing her how to brush her dolls hair.

I go in and tell her to do what I said. And do you know what happens next? Do ya?

My MIL tells me that she’s showing her something, turns around and tells her to finish what she was showing her.

What the fuck.

Another Case and Point:

My MIL bought white tank tops for the girls so they would have matching shirts for pictures. She bought 1 pack and since Lael needed new ones for the Fall I said that I would keep them so that I don’t have to buy any.

D’s mom never puts them on her so there would be no need for her to keep any. I made this point and D tried to argue with me that she does wear them. I shut her down and explained that in the almost 9 years that she’s been on earth her mother has NEVER send undershirts/tanks to go under her shirts.

I thought that was the end of it and told the kids to pack their bags and for Lael to put the shirts in her suitcase. Well a few minutes later they come down and my MIL says she gave D 2 and Lael 2.

I thought I had made myself clear. But apparently when they went upstairs D whined to my MIL about it and she gave her what she wanted.

It wasn’t about the shirts it was about not wanting Lael to have something that she didn’t have. I was pissed. So I went upstairs and put ALL of them in D's bag. I told Lael I would just buy her new ones.

Am I being sensitive because I thought it was kind of disrespectful. The last time I checked, I was the parent.

And being the parent, she should have done what I said first and then what she wanted to second.

Scenarios like this happened quite a few times between Sunday and Monday.

The thing is, I don’t have this problem with Lael. She knows better. It doesn’t matter what grandma or anyone else says. She’s gonna do what mom said first.

Is it D playing me? Is my MIL playing me?

I explained to hubby that is seems like whenever we are around her she forgets that I am the parent but more so with D not Lael. She hardly steps in when I’m correcting her.

I feel like because I am the step-mother I am not taken seriously and that she feels she has more of a say so than I do. Am I crazy?

What should I do?

A New Challenge

So once again we had D for part of the summer. She's been here since June 11th. OMGsh she has been the biggest helper. She quick and willing to damn near breastfeed Kobi.

The problem? I forget about Lael.

I don't mean I forget her but I forget that it was her that watched my tummy grow everyday and all she talked about was being able to help with her brother.

Last night I lay in bed and Lael comes in my room. She starts crying and I had no clue what the problem was.

Apparently I've been overlooking her in the helper area. She told me how I gave her diaper job away to D (one that was hers tje first 3 weeks of his life). She said that I always ask D to help me and never her.

She's right. Just because D is quicker and older doesn't make it right.

D will be going home next week and then it will be Lael and Kobi again. She will be my only helper until Aug.

The challenge: Keeping them both involved without any hurt feelings.

Fun times are ahead.

A New Year!

I can't believe I haven't posted since the 21st.

I won't bore you with the whole "this is what we did for Christmas" or " I did this on New Years".

All I will say is that it was great.  The girls were happy.  All my fears from before worked themselves out.

We ended up getting both of the girls DSi's and they were just as spoiled as before so all is well.

The only thing I regret was that I didn't put as much into Christmas as I usually do.  Lael didn't get to visit Santa this year, I didn't get any pictures taken and I didn't make cookies.  But we did do a ready to bake thing.  Shout out to Pillsbury!!

The pregnancy is going GREAT! I'll be 21 weeks in a few days.  Whoo Hoo!  I know I teased everyone a few weeks ago about finding out the sex but my appointment got screwed up.

Many suggested I should have thrown a tantrum right there in the middle of the hospital but I have more class than that.  Ahem.

So anywho, I have my Sonogram scheduled for 8am Friday morning.  I respectively I took the day off so that I can SHOP!  Well not really because Christmas broke me even more than I already was.  Don't you read my Tweets, hotdogs and beans and cereal it what we'll be eating for dinner.  Just kidding. Not not really.

That's about all that's going on over here.  I don't do New Year's resolutions too much.  It's just another way to beat myself up for not following through.  But I do want to try to waist less money this year.  I want to bring my lunch to work everyday and try to put more into my invisible savings account.  Yall have any resolutions?  Let me hear them.

Well here a few pics of Christmas to tie you over.  I'll post again tomorrow.  Maybe. I hope.  Ok at least by Friday.  Or Sunday.  Whatever.  It's my blog. :o)

Christmas With A Blended Family

Christmas.

It's a wonderful time of year.  It's actually my favorite time of year.  It's sad that people are usually only nice during these next few months and not so much the rest of the year.

That being said, as excited as I am to have this season upon us I am also stressed.

The stress comes from being a part of a blended family.

I love D with all my heart.  I love being a step-mom.  But during the holiday's it's a challeging time.

Some may know but right now my hubby still stays at home so there is only my income.  We have adjusted our lifestyles to this but not everyone keeps that in mind.

We get D every other holiday.  Last year we had her for Thanksgiving and for her birthday (Dec 31st).

This year we get her for Christmas.

I know I should be excited about this, and believe me I am.  But some anxiety comes with that as well.

The thing is.  She gets 2 Christmases and Lael gets 1.

What I mean by this, is that I have to find a way to not let Lael's plethera of gifts trump D's few items.

How do I do this?

It has been a challenge EVERY other year.

We pay child support and her mother has spend about 2-3 hundred on her but we are expected to spend the same.

I don't agree.

I don't agree that she should get 2 full Christmases.  I can not afford to spend 3 hundred on each of the girls.  I think it's ridiculous.

A few weeks ago I had D's mom send me her Christmas list.  There were some pretty pricey items on there.

For her 6th birthday hubby bought her a Nintendo DS.  I thought it was a big gift for a little girl but he got it anyway.

She took pretty good care of it for a while untill she left it in her bike at her moms and some girl took it when she wasn't home and dropped it.  Since then it won't work unless it is plugged up.

So guess what my husband does?

He tells her he will buy her a new one.  But not a regular DS but a DSi the ones that cost about $170.

For fucking real? That was my first thought.

Then when I spoke with her mom about other gifts she mentioned a Barbie Townhouse.  Guess how much that is?

$145.  NOWAYINHELL.

Not gonna happen. 

I explained that it was impossible for me to afford that.  While she is only spending on D we have to spend for both girls. 

Somethings gotta give.

It's not that she doesn't understand it's getting D to understand.

She doesn't understand child support and that we can't send her mom $500 a month and also spend 3 on her for Christmas and still be able to provide for our other child.

All she will see is her 3 or 4 gift and Lael's 10-15 gifts.  Numbers matter not price.

Lael now saw the DSi on TV and asked for it.  How do you think she gonna feel when her sister get the new one with a camera built in and she still has her old crusty one?

Hmph.

What to do.  Get them both DSi's and then a few cheap gifts?

Sell my blood for Christmas money?

I would pimp myself out but something tells me my fat belly would repulse some.

I love Christmas time but making everyone happy can make it suck sometimes.