Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Things I’ve Learned This Week (And it’s only Wednesday)

In no particular order…..

-I will never get enough sleep. Ever.

-No matter how old they get, males will constantly forget to flush the toilet.

-In addition to flushing, they will also forget to put the seat down, I learned that the hard way.

-Apple Juice molds quickly in a thermos that been left at school for 5 days.

-The baby will trick me into believing he will only wake once at night and when I get used to that idea he will stab me in the back by waking up at 2, 4 and 5 this morning.

-Apparently I’m responsible for keeping up with all my things and knowing what Lael did with all her things as well. Also, I’m expected to be psychic.

-The only time I will have to myself is between 6 and 6:30am. I have learned that it is totally worth getting up early to savor these minutes.

-I haven’t done enough kegels (take that however you please).

-I have no friends (irl) to rescue me. I have 2 friends and they are in NJ and Germany. I am fucked.

-The baby is skilled enough to throw up and manage to get it IN my mouth.

-I am officially a soccer mom. You know the kind that threatens to beat her kid if she doesn’t kick the damn ball. She’ll score 3 goals which makes the sore throat totally worth it.

What things have you learned this week so far? I can’t be the only one.

Please tell me I’m not.


  1. You are not alone in the no friends irl who can save you. Mine (the few that I have) live out of state. I SO get it.

    You just gave birth--don't sweat it about the Kegels. Just get used to being leaky the rest of your life :)

    And you are right--it's worth it to get up early for *just* that half hour.

  2. I've learned that the color purple on my husband's mood bracelet means he is sensual/excited. Awe-some.

    Seriously though - puke IN the mouth. Too much learning.

  3. I have learned a lot this week as well!!! I've learned that I will never feel rested and I don't have a new baby! Hang in there.


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