Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Since I Brought It Up

Last week me and a couple of girlfriends were talking about sex. What to do, what not to do and so forth.

Somehow the topic turned to talking to our kids about sex and where babies come from. I was quick to dismiss the idea because, hello, Lael is barely a kid. I mean she's borderline Pre-School age. Ok, so what, she's almost 6 but still way to early right?

Well one brought up a recent episode of Oprah. You know, theknoweverythingabouteverything Oprah.

Apparently she had some experts on her show who explained how to give the sex talk to your kids and at what age.

They say if you wait too late the kids will learn from other kids and it will be harder to change their perception.

Me and my friends talked about this and all had different ideas. When do you teach them correct body part names?

Some parents do it from the very beginning, some don't.

Lael knows boobs (breast) booty (butt) poo poo (vagina) the long sticky thing/pee pee (penis).

When do I get technical with her? Further more, when do I start talking to her about sex? I mean seriously?

Out of curiosity I asked her where babies come from the other day.

Her: From your belly.

Me: Well how do they get there?

Her: When you wish for a baby, you know at the wishing well.

Me: Ok, but WHO puts the baby there?

Her: ~Silence~ Well you know, food. When you eat your belly gets big and then *BOOM* the baby is there.

Me: Verywellthen.

Whew is what I really thought. If she had told me from me and daddy doing the do I probably would have died right there on the sidewalk.

So my bloggy friends. Here is your homework. When did you teach your kids these things? What worked for you and your family?

Damn. I'm stressed just typing about it. Lord knows if I got pregnant from eating you'd see a show "Keyona, 18 Kids And Counting.

I quit.


  1. I've always used the correct words for body parts. Now than my three are a little bit older, I fall back on only answering what's asked. No more, no less. We have good communication, and my kids know I'm not mortified by things, so I think they feel pretty comfortable. My youngest (girl) is 7, and although very... umm... interested... in things, she doesn't ask much yet. Other than "why does it FEEL that way?" eeek
    My 8 yr old (boy) is pretty clueless still, and he asks his big brother (11) for clarification. Big brother is uber responsible, and takes the task of relaying accurate info very seriously. The 11 yr old started hearing things at school a few years ago and is cool enough to come right home and fact check. The really OMG stuff, I punt to my husband. Part cop out, mostly that I don't know what it feels like to be a boy. Although I did get caught by surprise a few months ago when the 11 yr old laughed and said "mom, is queef a real world". Shoot me now...
    Bottom line, I try to keep communication open on all topics, so they feel ok asking questions. Then I answer only what's asked. If I'm not sure what the question is getting at, or how graphic I might need to get,I say "why do you ask?" then I get enough clarification to give an appropriate answer.

    I bet it was easier to get those journalists out of N.Korea than it is to negotiate the birds and the bees with budding children.

  2. The long/sticky thing!!!!! That is freakin hilarious.

    I was just thinking about this the other day since my stepson is going into High School this year.

    He had sex-ed last year where they taught abstinence AND how to put a condom on?!?! WTF, right!

  3. I agree with Michelle although we are not all aboard with the proper name thing yet. I have a 3 and 4 year old boy and another boy due in November. When ask questions by the boys i try to answer as simple (and at age level) and honest as possible.

    Being pregnant a lot more questios have arose than i thought would. My 4 yo recently ask how the baby comes out and why it is in there. I tried to tell him that mommy and daddy put the baby in mommy's tummy with love and that a midwife would help mommy get the baby out. I left it at that and it seemed to satisfy his mind (at least for the time being).

    Although i have learned to watch what i am watching on tv in front of him. i was watching an episode of Birth Day on TLC and i suppose he was watching as well cause he later told me that the saw that doctor take that baby out of the ladies butt. I then i had to be a little more creative when explaining that the baby did not come out of her butt.

  4. How about the one-eyed monster? lol

    Nowadays kids learn things at an early age. Some of my 4th graders make comments or say some things that really surprise me and scare me at the same time cause at their age I didn't know scrap!

    I remember learning about sex in school. My parents actually NEVER told me anything. Well my mom explained to me about a girl's cycle. The rest I learned in school and still learning. lol

  5. Ah, I dread this talk! I have taught the correct terms with my girls, but when we need to refer to them, we just use the term "privates." As for the all-out talk, it hasn't happened yet, but I know it will be sooner than later. I'm sure it will make a good blog post, LOL!

  6. LOL, that's too funny! We always have used the medical terms, but the kids call it and pagina and venis. Oh, well. We tried.

  7. I'm impressed that you asked her where babies come from. The thought of inviting a possible conversation like that freaks me out!!!

  8. we've been naming body parts by proper names since day one. My daughter knows that Daddy has a Penis and that she has a jabia (labia) We've decided that we will answer questions and discuss things as they come up naturally. It's tough one to figure out because we don't want her to lose her naivete too early but we want her to be informed

  9. I like the Dr. Phil rule of giving them just the info they need and no more.

    My friend just began "the talk" with her almost second grader by reading a book. He asked her a few questions. She answered them simply and didn't overwhelm him with information.

    This is what I plan to do. Not sure when. But sooner rather than later. (my oldest is entering kindergarten)

  10. So glad you brought this up. My daughter is starting to ask questions and I'm answering them as we go and luckily she hasn't gotten too deep before losing interest. But I know the day is coming..

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Those laughing with me...or at me.